Grow together as a couple
Often, after a couple has been together for a while they don’t make as much time to grow together. We grow in our business life, or as a parent, or in the areas of our individual interests, but what are you doing together to grow? If you only grow individually and aren’t sharing some of these experiences together you will probably find yourselves growing apart. There won’t be as much to talk about, and you’ll have a more difficult time understanding where your significant other’s point of view is coming from. Not sure how to “grow together”? Consider a few of these ideas:
Take a class together, such as painting, home repair, cooking, or music. The possibilities are endless. Experience new things together: you might want to attend a lecture and then discuss your thoughts and ideas on the presentation, or take up a shared physical activity like salsa dancing, hiking, or fishing. Build something together. Design your dream house on the computer.
Create habits as a couple where you show your love to each other
Here are three simple habits you can create with your significant other to improve your relationship by showing and sharing your love in small ways throughout the day.
Kiss each other in the morning. Have a ritual in which whoever leaves the bedroom first gives the other a kiss. This way if you don’t get a chance to see each other again before one of you leaves for work, you’ve shown appreciation and love for each other. Cuddle up together. When you sit down to watch a movie or TV show together, sit together on the couch and hold hands or touch for a while. You don’t have to stay this way the entire time, but show your partner that you want to be near them and touch them. Kiss the cook. Whoever makes dinner receives a kiss before dinner, which shows appreciation for their effort. Make it a point to express your gratitude for the meal as well.
Eliminate distractions when you are together
If I’m talking to someone and they are checking their phone or on the computer it doesn’t feel like they are listening. When you are with your significant other, put the gadgets away. Have a strict rule during dinner that you don’t answer the phone or the doorbell, or check text messages. Focus on each other.
If you have a lot of distractions at home—possibly from your children—schedule time away together regularly when it will just be the two of you and you can focus on each other. Try to leave talk of work and your kids behind and focus on the hobbies and interests you share together. Need more ideas for when you are out together on a
Laugh together more
I bet you have a lot of funny moments and inside jokes with your partner, so be sure to bring those up and laugh together more often. If you have a cute name for your spouse, use it (but not too often). What were the funny moments that occurred while you were first dating, when you got married or when your children were born? Remembering and laughing about these times together strengthens your bond and make you feel happier. Last year my husband discovered the song “It’s Business Time” by Flight of the Conchords. Lyrics from this song have become a running joke that brings a smile to both our faces. We also love Jonathan Coulton’s “Shopvac” for its funny take on suburban angst. These songs are also great for reminding us what we don’t want our lives to turn into. Find some music, videos or shows that you can both laugh at together and reference them to bring in more laughter. Looking for more keys to a successful relationship? Find 10 here.
